‘The Squashbuckler Diaries’ are the daily tales of Joy Shelley’s Life in the Dream. The ‘Lost in Dreams’ books will tell the story of what happens to her at ages 6, 9, 12, 15, and so on. The diaries tell us what happens before, after, and between the books.

S02E20 Joy’s Morning, Part 5: Too Clean

Justin uses the time that Suzy is washing Joy in our apartment to catch up with Charlie on everything that happened the previous day when Joy had run away from home. 

“Then my dad killed me again,” Charlie says. “And when I fell asleep again I knew I couldn’t kill him. Joy and Master Mind and General Hawk, they all said that her bad dad could kill my bad dad, so I--” 

“There she is!” Suzy’s voice is close and we all look up. 

Joy and Suzy are already on board, next to us. Joy is clean - clean of the blood on her face and from the dirt everywhere. Her hair is long and wet and no longer in a ponytail. 

“Whoa,” Justin says. “How was it?” 

Joy makes a face. “It was nice, but I’m too clean now!” 

“Too clean?” Suzy doesn’t understand. “There’s no such--” 

“And I want my ponytail back!” 

“As soon as it dries. Now, Justin, she can’t take a shower and get back into the same dirty clothes. She needs a lot of new--” 

“No! Never!” Joy yells. 

“Mom, one day at a time. This is too much.” 

Suzy thinks for a second, then nods. Joy relaxes. 

Then she smells herself. “I smell terrible!” 

“Smell terrible? You smell like pine!”

“Phooey pine! I’m too clean!” 

“Walt, help me with this.” 

“Dad!” Joy doesn’t wait. “I want a huge pile of dirt.” 

Justin smiles. “There you go!” A small hill of dirt appears on the corner of the small island, at the edge of our garden, near where Bonny’s Revenge’s ramp touches the ground.

Before I or Suzy realize what’s happening, Joy sprints down the ramp and jumps into the pile of dirt, disappearing inside. She seems to wrestle in the ground. She wrestles and wrestles and then comes out, all full of dirt. 

“There! Now I feel good!” She says and runs back up. “My hair’s dry now. I want my ponytail.” 

Justin has a huge smile on his face. He goes to Suzy and puts a hand on her shoulder. “Nice try, Mom. Welcome to my world.” And he laughs. “All right, are we all done here?” he raises his voice talking to everyone. “Can we just start our day?” 

“Yes!” Joy shouted. 

But there was one more thing to be done before we could start our day. I’ll tell you about it next time.

—Told by Grampa Walt

S02E21 Joy’s Morning, Part 6: A Healthy Breakfast

S02E19 Joy’s Morning, Part 4: Convincing Joy