‘The Squashbuckler Diaries’ are the daily tales of Joy Shelley’s Life in the Dream. The ‘Lost in Dreams’ books will tell the story of what happens to her at ages 6, 9, 12, 15, and so on. The diaries tell us what happens before, after, and between the books.

#387: The Two Killers, Part 2

Dragon Little cried. It gushed out of her like a tidal wave. 

I could not see her, since she was in the Infinite Prison in the belly of Bonny’s Revenge

I wanted to hold her and make it better. But I could not.

As she cried, I heard the rustling of the iron bars of General Hawk’s cell. And then I heard the sound of skin and feathers on human skin: he was not caressing her. He had reached out of the bars with his arm and burnt wing and was holding her as much as he could.

“I killed the Goblin Monster!” she said again, crying. 

“It is hard to kill, Nestling,” he said calmly in his deep, fatherly voice.

She cried and he held her. 

“It is hard to know we destroyed a life,” he said. 

“Yes!” she exclaimed and cried harder. 

“It is hard to know he had a family and friends and maybe even children.” 

“YES!” she was sobbing uncontrollably now. 

“It is hard, Nestling,” he repeated, his tone unchanging. “You are so powerful, you can destroy lives every day.” 

“YES!” 

“But you don’t. You only kill when the villain leaves you no choice. When you defeated me, I went down honorably. You did not have to kill me.” 

“That’s right!” Dragon Little said forcefully. Her crying slowed down. 

“Even Master Mind,” whom I learned over time was in a cell opposite and near General Hawk, “that terrible villain, left you a choice. All the villains here left you a choice. But the Goblin Monster didn’t.” 

“That’s right!” her voice was loud and her crying was getting softer. 

“All the villains here owe you their lives. All the people you have saved by defeating us owe you their lives. The Goblin Monster’s victims owe you their lives.

“Mmmmm…” said Dragon Little, now only sniffing. 

The two were silent. Then I heard Dragon Little, “The Evil Forest Fairy King left you no choice?” 

“That is correct, Nestling. His actions would have led to your death. There was no other way to stop him.” 

There was silence again. 

“I believe you,” said Dragon Little. 

“Mmmmm,” General Hawk said. “I did not like your anger. But I bore it because I knew it saved your life.” 

The two fell into silence again. The crying had stopped. 

But the conversation had not ended. 

Tomorrow I will tell of the other things they talked about.

—Told by The Red Dragon


#388: The Two Killers, Part 3

#373: Life and Death, Part 6: Back to Killing